Monday, April 30, 2012

Redneck Wisdom

There is a fine line between insanity and coping with your daughter dating.
------------------------------------------------------------------------- Duck Dynasty

Saturday, April 28, 2012

When Life Throws You a Curve Ball



Puff: 

Hey, Bear when life throws you curve balls, there are two ways to respond

1. You can catch the ball in your mitt, and take it out of play.

Or

2. You can hit it out of the park.

Bear:  

What if you swing and miss.

Puff:

Ah well, that's why you make sure God is your catcher.


Tuesday, April 24, 2012

She says; She means: Nothing.

The lady  in your life has a "look" on her face.  And you ask her, "What's wrong?"  she answers, "Nothing."

Nothing can mean

Nothing... you'd understand The concept with this is that she could explain it to you but you wouldn't understand the intricacies of the situation.  She has decided that it isn't worth the air to explain it to you.
This is usually the case when the problem concerns other women, especially friends.  Something either happened to the friend, or something happened with regard to a friend and she has to work out a solution.    Besides there is no way a MAN could figure out what is needed in any situation involving a woman and her friends.  Trust me, if this is the reason behind her: "Nothing"  you are best advised to not interfere, don't ask for elaboration, don't try to engage her, just accept her NOTHING and move on. Tell her where you'll be if she needs you later.

Nothing... with which you'd be able to help. Her problem either requires delicacy, tact, sophistication or logic to be solved.  All attributes which you lack.  Don't take this too personally.  You just aren't made that way. It is in short a different way of saying the above, only that it does not necessarily involve another woman.  It is really any other problem.  It may also be a problem stemming from something you did or didn't do.  And if you did or didn't do something, and caused the problem, why in the world would she want your help to fix the situation.  So if this is the reason behind her,"Nothing," it is best for you not to delve any further. Don't ask for an explanation because you think you might be able to help.  If she decides she needs your help to carry out the solution she'll let you know, so tell her where you'll be if she should need you later.

I'd better say, "Nothing." because I've been telling you all this for over a week, and every time I mention it, you say something stupid so it is better I just say,... "Nothing." You haven't noticed the problem that has developed so you either don't think it is a problem, or you have no intention of solving the problem so she'll go it alone. If she believes you've let a situation develop into a problem without solving it, do you really think she wants your help now?  My advice to you if this is the real reason behind her simple, "Nothing," is to not pursue the line of questioning and retreat. She may decide that a problem needs to be aired so feel free to tell her where you'll be if she should need to talk to you later.  



IF there are any other womanspeak you need translated, please feel free to place in the commbox and I will attempt to explain next week Tuesday.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

I'm losing my religion (or the desire to write about it)

I'm finding that I have really nothing to say about the church or my faith.  The parish we attend now, the pastor and all the priests celebrate the Mass according to the new translation and don't change the words and don't add anything.  So there is nothing to complain about there.  My faith is not being tested (at the moment.)

Lately, if you've noticed, I haven't written about the Church, the Mass Translation, adherences and total disregard of the GIRM.  It isn't that there isn't stuff out there.  The celebrant last week mentioned that the persecution of the church was coming, that it has started, and it was only going to get worse. And all I could think was: Well, maybe that's what we need.  The church becomes stronger when it is attacked. Maybe it will stir us to fight, we are the Church Militant after all.  I just don't want to share my opinion on it, whether it's true, or not, or how we should organize or pray or fast or whatever.


I started out writing a post on how I have nothing to write about regarding the Church or my faith and ended up writing about the persecution that is coming.





Saturday, April 21, 2012

Quarterly Weigh-In

Very few people know this, though  do have a tracker located somewhere on along the sidebar, I have been attempting to slim down since January.  My weight whence I started was 181 lbs.  I have steadily reduced my weight and updated the tracker over the last few months. At present I am 164.2 lbs.  My goal is to get to a more healthy 145( Another 19.2 lbs to go) by the summer (I haven't really decided if it's the BEGINNING or the END of summer, just summer.)  According to the numbers my maximum healthy weight for my age and height is 133.  I'll work on getting to that after maintaining the 145 for a bit.

My healthy BMI is 27 or lower.  4 more points to go.

BWH measurements: None of your business.

Don't ask me how I lost the weight.  I have a sneaking suspicion that some weight loss is a side effect of some meds I'm on.  Though I have read that people have also gained weight while on this med. Oh vell, maybe it's got nothing to do with the meds.

  LilySlim Weight loss tickers

Friday, April 20, 2012

WILDCARD!

Arwen's team will be going to the Global Finals for Destination Imagination in Knoxville Tennessee between May 23 to the 26 of this year.

Prayers that the fundraising is successful and that it brings down the travel fare.

They were granted the WILDCARD position.

We will be telling her that there is a good chance she and her team will NOT win, so she and they should have as much fun as they can.  We also need to tell them that if they want to win they are going to have to work really really hard.  Oh dear, I have no idea how to keep my advice to her balanced.

All I can think of right now is:  What books do I want to donate for the BOOK SALE?  Where are the passport application forms?  And can we get a kid's lawyer parent to prepare the affidavits regarding giving permission for a child to travel across the border, and will he do it for free?????

Oh Actually, how do we tell Arwen.  I was thinking of getting a cake from the Italian Bakery and writing the news on it: WILDCARD DI TN GF.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

She speaks; She means: The Nod

Gentlemen has this ever happened to you.  You are speaking to your wife (girlfriend, fiancee, mother, sister, aunt grandmother etc etc) and as you present your case or idea or defence or whatever, you see her nodding as you speak.  And you begin to think that she is agreeing with you and you may even think you have won her over.  And then you stop thinking she will agree, say yes, etc etc.  YOU ARE WRONG.

A NOD of the head does NOT mean yes or accordance with what she is hearing.  It is merely, and I do mean merely, a sign of acknowledgement , rather it is a sign to you that she is listening, and is grasping and understands each part of your logic.  It does not mean that she agrees. In fact the more nodding she does generally means the more points she will refute when its her turn to talk.

This applies if she nods slowly, methodically, and in time with your presentation of your points.  If on the other hand, she begins to nod quickly, what she is saying quietly, in her head is "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I know, I get what you are trying to say but..." before saying aloud, "You are completely wrong." or more simply,"No"

So just to help you along, the nod does not mean yes, or agreement or even you are right.  It just means:  I acknowledge that you are saying something and I have heard what you are saying. Nothing more.

Any other Woman speak you might need translated, please leave in commbox and I will translate next week, Tuesday.  Otherwise I will be translating "Nothing"

Monday, April 16, 2012

Happy Birthday Your Holiness

Source- The Crescat

Arwen was devastated, she's better now

Her team will not be going to Knoxville, Tennessee for the Destination Imagination Global Finals in May.

Arwen's team, "The Imaginators" finished out of the medals at the Provincials, on Saturday.  There were three teams from her school at the provincials.  One team succeeded in advancing to the Global Finals.  We wish them good luck.

Arwen promptly announced that she never wanted to do DI again.  I said that I wasn't going to force her to, but she should know that I would rather she failed a hundred times than never fail once because she never tried.

She must have reconsidered because the next day she asked if we could continue saving for the Globals next year. I said, "Absolutely- and why don't we go ahead and get the passports anyway?"

Thursday, April 12, 2012

just curious please answer poll

what brought you here?

Arwen is Going to the Destination Imagination Provincials

this Saturday.  Prayers would be appreciated.  If they come up first or second out of six teams, 2 against which they have already competed and bested, they move on to the Globals in Knoxville, Tennessee May 23-26.

Thing is she has a head cold.  Nothing serious, but enough to make her feel awful.  She would like your prayers that this virus is of the 24 or 48 hour variety and works its way out by Saturday.




Tuesday, April 10, 2012

She Says She Means: I'll be ready in five minutes. UPDATED

She means she'll be ready in five minutes.

Unless, she notices that her hair got mussed up when she slipped on her dress/gown, and she needs to fix her hair again; or there is a run in her silk stockings, and she needs to replace them; or she dropped the back of her earring and can't find it, so she needs to rethink her jewellery for the evening; or she broke her heel and needs to pull out another pair of shoes, which would not go with the little black dress she was going to wear, so she needs to change into her electric blue cocktail dress instead, which means her make-up colour palette needs to change.

All these things are beyond her control, and therefore cannot be factored into her calculations.

UPDATED PART
Any other suggestions for translations of woman-speak to man-speak, please place in commbox.
I will translate next Tuesday

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Palm Sunday of the Passion of the Lord ::: April Fools' Day

Went to mass.  Got a palm.  Galadriel was pressed into making palm crosses for the parishioners; not just the kids either.


It always gets me how quickly we go from His triumphant entry to his crucifixion.  How fickle is man.  How selfish. How corrupt.  As Catholics and Christians we have the benefit of having hindsight.  We know how things end.  He rises.  He wins.  But how many of us would have been steadfast disciples of Christ?  How many of us would have remained devout Jews? How many of us would have looked at Him and said, "The man is nuts.  Who in their right mind could believe his drivel.  They are the rantings of a mad man."


                               


As it was Palm Sunday Arwen and I felt that it would have been inappropriate to catch a April's Fool.  So, we didn't do anything to anybody.  Infact....

Arwen and I made sure that Galadriel knew that we did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to her bed.  Nothing was hiding in her bed.  Nothing was going to surprise her during the night and make her scream.  I could even swear on a stack, granted, I never stated of what the stack was made, but still Arwen and I left Galadriel's bed alone.  Honestly.  Really.  Truly.  We didn't do anything.

And after spending a good 1/2 hour checking, beating, punching, moving her bed and looking under the mattress and under the bed, she finally believed us, and went to bed.


Scripture to keep in mind

Six things there are, which the Lord hateth, and the seventh his soul detesteth: [17] Haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, [18] A heart that deviseth wicked plots, feet that are swift to run into mischief, [19]A deceitful witness that uttereth lies, and him that soweth discord among brethren. [20] My son, keep the commandments of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother. ***Cf:Douay-Rheims Proverbs 6: 16-20

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